A Fish Asleep
by Will Bailey

Bad times.
We’re in mourning. A pall has fallen over House Nailthbailth, and only time will tell if the dark veil is ever lifted. It all started when I was returning from an afternoon jog and received a phone call from Wife. “Where are you? Something terrible has happened.” My heart sank to my stomach as I immediately assumed the worst: “She burned the macaroni and cheese balls.” I’ll never forget how walking down the back steps seemed to take an eternity, mostly because of how lazy I felt after my run. As soon as I stepped inside, I could smell it: Cat’s litter box – it needed to be changed. Making a mental note of this, I continued into the living room, where I found Wife curled in a ball on the couch, covered in blankets. But then I realized that was just a ball of blankets, and Wife was actually sitting in front of the fish tank, not saying a word. Before I could ask what happened, Wife slowly turned to face me and whispered, “He’s dead.” I whispered back, “Are you sure?” then cleared my throat and said it again in a normal voice. I glanced at the bottom of the tank. Sure enough, our fish, Fish, was belly-up. I grabbed the fish net. Wife fled to the bedroom – she couldn’t bear to watch. But then I remembered what happened in Terminator 1 when they thought the Terminator was dead, and it wasn’t. A glimmer of hope flashed through my brain. Or was I severely dehydrated? That’s when I nudged Fish with the net. Nope, definitely dead.

y. . .discovery.
Has Cat been questioned closely regarding this discover?
There’s no way I’m getting into an interrogation room alone with Cat.
Poor Fish. Will you bury him at sea?
I’m not trying to tell you how to live your life but I hope you had a nice funeral for Fish, as in a custom coffin and burial plot in the back yard under a pretty flowering bush. I do not like when toilets are used for anything other than #1 or #2. Putting Fish into the toilet would be icky….or actually in this case, ‘ichthy’… ;-(
Um… Yea… It was…. a lovely service.
Unrelated: your name is awesome.
Hmmm. Methinks you dissemble.
Thanks for the compliment, and to reciprocate, your blog is awesome!
Huh…sounds like a pretty selfish fish to me. I mean, prematurely dying before YOU felt ready to flush him down the toilet??
Ugh…way to die before your time, Fish…you jerk.
Clearly your grief is taking the form of anger. It’s OK. We all have our own ways of coping.
I’m clearly only at Stage 3 in the grief process.
Pretty soon, I’m going to start Bargaining. As in, “C’mon, Fish…if you just swim up the drain into Will’s toilet again, I will buy you a new colour of gravel for your fishtank. I hear purple is the trendy colour for this year…”
So sorry, but he is in Fish heaven now…
Let’s hope so. I imagine the alternative isn’t pleasant.
I’m sorry for your loss. I’m sure Fish was a dear friend.
Btw,you’re an incredible artist!
Kennisha
He was never really available when I actually needed him, but I guess I should let bygones be bygones.
Thank you!
Similar trauma in my childhood – dad away on vacation, mom turned the thermostat up in the fish tank thinking that the fish were too cold – they all committed suicide by jumping out of the tank. Dad kept the next fish tank in his office. They lived and he didn’t kill my mom.
The only thing missing here is a chaise lounge and a $200 therapy invoice.
They were smart enough to put money aside for the therapy – just in case.