February 20, 2012
Ladle mule.
I’m tripping. Rest assured, I have not consumed illegal substances of any kind. In fact, most of the ingredients I have shoved into my mouth with the heel of my palm like a confidence man stuffing his suitcase as the police pound on his motel door at three o’clock in the morning could be grown in your own backyard, in plain sight of your nosy neighbor’s telescope, without skyrocketing you to the top of the DEA’s to-do list. That is because the substance I have been abusing for the past thirty minutes is homemade tomato risotto, and, as a result, I am now officially a Schedule I addict. Thankfully, I’m not alone. Wife is also intensely tripping on creamy rice, parmesan cheese and enough lycopene to make an elephant purr. But don’t blame me for corrupting her pure soul. She stirred the pot, for crying out loud! I was merely responsible for ladling the vegetable broth into the mix-I’m just a lowly Ladle Mule, I tell you! But none of that matters now. That was long before either one of us’d had our first taste of t-rizz (that’s street for tomato risotto). We had no idea that we were about to be permanently transformed into full blown t-rizz fiends. With each sumptuous bite, we felt the natural energizing properties of Lycopersicon esculentum course through our veins like that scene in Spiderman when mild-mannered Peter Parker ate a bunch of tomato risotto and felt really strong all of the sudden. Seriously, if this humor blog thing doesn’t pan out, I’m going to start selling this stuff in mason jars on the side of the highway. Hey, I’m already a user. I might as well be a pusher, too.
Always good to have a Plan B in life. However, your blog is great, funny stuff!
Please share your ingredients – I hadn’t thought of a tomato risotto before.
I get such a smile when I read your blogs – keep ‘em coming.
So glad you’ve been enjoying! Here is the recipe (it’s from “Easy Vegetarian” – http://www.rylandpeters.com):
1 quart vegetable broth
4 tbsp unsalted butter
1 tbsp olive oil
8 shallots, finely chopped
2 garlic cloves, crushed
1 1/2 cups risotto rice (I like arborio)
1/3 cup white wine
8 firm tomatoes, seeded and coarsely chopped
5 oz grated Parmesan cheese, 1 1/2 cups, plus extra to serve
a large handful of fresh basil leaves, torn
sea salt and freshly ground black pepper
Put the broth in a saucepan. Heat until almost boiling, then reduce the heat until barely simmering to keep it hot.
Heat the butter and olive oil in a deep skillet over medium heat. Add the shallots and cook for 1-2 minutes, until softened but not browned. Add the garlic and mix well.
Add the rice and stir with a wooden spoon until the grains are well coated and glistening, about 1 minutes. Pour in the wine and stir until it has been completely absorbed.
Add 1 ladle of hot broth and simmer, stirring until it has been absorbed. Repeat. After 10 minutes, add the tomatoes. Continue to add the broth at intervals and cook as before, for a further 8-10 minutes, until the liquid has been absorbed and the tomatoes and rice are tender but still firm. Reserve the last ladle of broth.
Add the reserved broth, Parmesan, basil, salt and pepper. mix well. Remove from the heat, cover, and let rest 2 minutes.
Spoon in to warm bowls, sprinkle with some freshly grated Parmesan, and serve immediately.
SERVES 4
Thanks Will – I love all risotto ideas !
In case someone would like to share in your delight – like me!
Check out the recipe above! Enjoy!