Visual synopsis.

Harry Potter and the Disoriented Husband

Visual synopsis.

Spoiler alert! If you have not read/seen/listened to/watched live! in concert/dreamed/or hallucinated the final installment of J. K. Rowling’s serial cash cow, “Harry Potter,” then consider yourself fairly warned that I am about to ruin the ending. Of course, I never read any of the books, and the only Harry Potter movie I’ve ever seen was the one I watched last night with Wife – “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2.” With that in mind, what I am about to tell you probably won’t ruin anything, because I understood approximately 2.5% of the plot. Here goes. Part 2 begins right where Part 1 left off: at the end of Part 1. There’s Harry. He’s a wizard. Why is this movie so dark? Seriously, it’s really hard to see anything, which sucks for me, because I have zero frame of reference for any of these characters. This must be what it feels like for someone who doesn’t speak English to watch “The Dark Knight” in English. Oh, there’s the bad guy. Unfortunately, I don’t know what to call him because nobody is saying his name. He kind of looks like a velociraptor. Is that what he is? A raptor? So far, I’ve learned that Harry Potter has to fight a raptor, and the brightness setting on my television maxes out at “80.” Why wouldn’t you make it go to “100?” Silly television designers! Now Harry is fighting the raptor, who also has a pet snake. Or is that part of the raptor’s tail? Like a snake tail? Wait, who’s that guy? It’s over.

About these ads

7 thoughts on “Harry Potter and the Disoriented Husband

  1. I feel like that when I watch the Harry movies with my daughter. Although I have read all the books, I don’t remember any details. I tell her I choose not to clutter my brain, but I really just don’t remember. Heavy sigh. At least you have the excuse of never reading the books.

  2. Thanks for following – hope you enjoy the Blogfestivus – 12 Days of Christmas.

    As for the Potter Kid, no interest in reading or watching. Not sure what all the fuss was about, but that’s show biz. What would you do with that cash cow if she came to your bank account?

  3. You just summed up my uncle’s and dad’s reactions to the entire series after having sat with us through all the movies and getting us all the books! That’s 10 years of our obsession against their indulgence and non-comprehension. :P

Comment!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s